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The Secret Gay History of the Catholic Church

The Michelangelo Code is a theory regarding the nature and origin of the clergy of the Roman Catholic Church.

The Michelangelo Code is a theory regarding the nature and origin of the clergy of the Roman Catholic Church from Dzseff, a graduate student of history living in Budapest. On December 1, 2006, the theory was launched on a largely unsuspecting world through the insidious vehicle of YouTube. The website is infrequently updated but exists because of the evolving nature of the concept, and as a means to respond to rapid new revelations.

To cut to the chase, the Michelangelo Code is this: Celibate = Gay. If you prefer to read text rather than watch a video, you can find the full transcript at the site, but it starts this way:

We were in Rome back in August, and went to the Vatican, and made the long snaking route through the museum to the Sistine Chapel. So we’re looking up at the ceiling, and I’m listening to the audioguide: this is God separating light from darkness, and this is God creating the Sun and the Moon…Creating the Sun and the Moon. And then I’m looking around at the rest of the ceiling. [ignudi] that’s right, Michelangelo was supposed to be Gay. In fact, he’s really gay. I don’t know if you’ve been to the Vatican Museum, but it’s basically some rooms by Raphael, the Sistine Chapel, and then acres of naked Classical sculpture. And I’m like, yeah, those Classicals they were kinda gay too. And, you know, the one actually inspired the other. The Popes started the cult of digging up statuary from antiquity, and basically began art collecting in its modern sense. And it was this cult for all things classical that fueled the Renaissances obsession with the human body. So I’m thinking… if the elite of Greece and Rome were gay, and Michelangelo was gay, then where were all the gay men in the intervening 1200 years? Where did all the gay men go when the Classical world collapsed?

So this essay is only gonna make sense if you believe people are genetically born gay. If you don’t believe in the gay gene, but instead think that homosexuality is sinful behavior brought on by bad-upbringing, then you’re probably gonna think this is all a bunch of nonsense. My personal theory is that a tendency to homosexuality began appearing in the new urban societies of the Mediterranean in the first millennium BC. It may possibly have been a response to the no longer pressing need for population growth, since these city states were already densely populated. I thought that was a really neat theory, but then I found out that Aristotle had postulated something pretty much the same.

Now the important thing to remember about Hellenic civilization is not that they created the foundations of western civilization, and literature, theatre, philosophy, they figured out that a²+b²=c² and that if you made a column a little bit fat that it looked straight…that they did all this…oh and they happened to be gay…THEY DID THIS BECAUSE THEY WERE GAY! The Greek miracle was produced by 45,000 men over 6 generations in a handful of city-states. And how did it happen? Pederasty. Sexual relations between man and adolescent. These men weren’t just having sexual relations with these lads, they were also teaching them all of the inherited wisdom and knowledge from ancient civilization… at a time before formal education.

I don't want to say anything too inflammatory, but Classical civilization (the Greeks and the Romans) was essentially a highly cultured gay elite supported on a superstructure of millions of enslaved heterosexuals, whose job was to produce and reproduce. And for its first two centuries Christianity was in large part a liberation movement for the heterosexual slaves.

Now the question I asked at the beginning seems rather pertinent because right now the Vatican is grappling with the "problem" homosexual priests. And let me stress before I begin, that my agenda is not pro or anti-gay, nor is it pro- or anti-catholic. My only agenda is try to determine what happened, and to understand it for its full complexity.

In 2005 the Vatican issued a new set of guidelines for seminarians studying to be priests.

  • The Catechism distinguishes between homosexual acts and homosexual tendencies.
  • while profoundly respecting the persons in question, cannot admit to the seminary or to holy orders those who practice homosexuality, present deep-seated homosexual tendencies or support the so-called "gay culture".
  • Different, however, would be the case in which one were dealing with homosexual tendencies that were only the expression of a transitory problem - for example, that of an adolescence not yet superseded. Nevertheless, such tendencies must be clearly overcome at least three years before ordination to the diaconate.

Well I've got news for the Vatican...I call it the Michelangelo Code and the code is this simple: Celibate = Gay. Or perhaps I ought better to rephrase that. As an answer the question I asked earlier, about where all the gay men went with the collapsed of the Classical World... well, I believe they hid in the clergy of the Catholic Church.

There's quite a bit of evidence to back up this theory but to find out more click View button below.

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NASA climatologist James Hansen has continued, in recent years, to offer the most useful projections of climate change, and the most outspoken interpretation of their meaning. Last December, in a paper delivered at the American Geophysical Union, he said that carbon concentrations in the atmosphere (currently 387 parts per million) were already above the safe line for preventing the possibility of the rapid rise of sea levels, shifts in monsoons, and other civilization-shaking disasters. We needed, he said, to take emergency action to push that number back below 350 parts per million. The only way to achieve that result, he added, was to close all coal-fired power plants in the next few decades, a truly monumental challenge.

This summer's rapid melt of Arctic ice has served only to underline the magnitude of Hansen's challenge, and indeed new data released in late September showed that carbon emissions have grown even faster than the most dire predictions of the IPCC. (The new numbers, ironically, came during the worst week so far of the Wall Street crisis, and the financial meltdown served to blot out any discussion of the meltdown meltdown.)

If the Chinese continue building coal-fired power plants for another decade while we wait for America to construct a shiny green city on the hill, the carbon load from those Chinese plants will force us toward many of the dangerous tipping points that Hansen and other scientists have identified in recent years. In that world, the rising seas will be lapping at the bottom of the hill, and the city up on top will be spending most of its dwindling capital dealing with the damage.

The world's governments are now nearing a real deadline: December 2009, when a negotiation session in Copenhagen is supposed to produce a new climate treaty, the successor to the Kyoto protocols And there's no good reason to think that the planet needs America alone to be in the lead position-the Europeans and the Japanese have already done far more, with technology and with policy, to limit global warming, and if you visit China you know that the hotels are already full of foreign consultants and advisers on global warming.

There is, therefore, no escaping the need for politics, for a robust international agreement that, among other things, commits America to sharing the burden for helping China and India develop without burning their piles of coal; building wind farms in Mongolia is even more crucial than in Minnesota. The controlling metaphor here is not the Manhattan Project or the Apollo moonshot; it is a Marshall Plan for carbons by which the global north makes up some of the difference between cheap coal and more expensive renewable energy for the global south-another possibility that has probably grown less likely as our financial strains have increased. But if the conventional wisdom doesn't line up behind such a plan soon, before the Copenhagen talks, then the chance will pass. Consider the words of a scientist, Rajendra Pachauri, who last year accepted the Nobel Prize on behalf of the IPCC, which he heads: "If there's no action before 2012, that's too late. What we do in the next two to three years will determine our future. This is the defining moment."

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